One of my (and prob your) favorite ways to learn new things is with quizzes. From love quizzes to style quizzes to celeb quizzes, not only do you gain new insight, but you also don't feel like you're learning, which makes everything way more fun. That's why clinical sexologist and co-founder ofThe Swann Center, Valerie Poppel, PhD, says couples quizzes are an A+ way to learn more about your partner, their values, and your relationship as a whole.
"Games are a fun and non-threatening activity that allow individuals to open up and share their authentic selves," Dr. Poppel explains. It's also a great way to understand more about yourself and your needs. "Most people are so busy throughout the hustle of the day that they only talk about logistics and surface-level conversations," adds clinical sexologist and psychotherapist,Kristie Overstreet, PhD.Get Access to *All* of Cosmo$20.00Join Now
While Dr. Overstreet says asking deep questions is essential for building intimacy and connection, it can also feel kinda interview-y. That's why she suggests using guided questions in a game format, versus just like, interrogating your date at dinner. This lets you learn more about each other in a low-stress way.
And before you think you already know everything about your significant other, Dr. Overstreet says that's definitely not the case, no matter how long you've been together. "We are constantly changing and evolving as people, from our thoughts, desires, and needs. This means there will always be something to learn about them," she says. "The issue is that most couples don't take the time to invest energy into deepening their intimacy so they miss this opportunity to connect and grow together."
That's where we come in! We've chatted with experts to come up with 50 of the best questions to ask your S.O. To play, each of you will answer the following Qs based on what you think your partner's answer is. You can write down all your answers at once or go one-by-one, taking turns revealing the answers to each other. Whatever you decide, Dr. Overstreet says you want to make sure you have plenty of time set aside to chat through the responses—being rushed or distracted isn't the move here.
If either of you gets a question wrong as you go along, simply take the time to talk about the answer and learn more about your partner. The goal isn't to get 100%, it's to walk away feeling even more in sync with your boo. So grab your partner and get to playing, because the prize is in the bond you're about to build.Related StoryWant to Get to Know Someone? Ask Them These Qs
It's a good idea to start the game off with some seemingly simple Qs, but Dr. Overstreet says that doesn't mean these are any less important to ask. "We continue to change and evolve so what we once liked may be different than what we're into currently," she says.
Chances are your partner's favorite color, book, or movie might have evolved since you last asked, so have fun getting to know where they're at right now, and remember—these will probably change again in the future. Besides, you should *always* know how your partner takes their coffee because hi, that's just Romance 101.Related StoryHello, Here's Literally 200+ Ideas for Date Night
Questions About the Past and Future:
Once you know where you're both at today, the next step is to chat about where you've been and where you want to go. Dr. Overstreet says it's important to talk about the past and future to see how your viewpoints are evolving. "The way you thought about [life] when you first started dating may have changed," she explains, which is why these questions are super valuable. This can give you insight surrounding where they want their life to go and how past actions are still affecting them today.
Questions About Values and Lifestyle:
Having aligning values—and respecting the ones that don't align—is major when it comes to forging a connection that lasts. But sometimes talking about personal beliefs can feel high-stakes, which is why going into this game with an open mind is essential. If your partner has a differing viewpoint than you—or simply just clams up—as you're going along, Dr. Overstreet says to take a step back. "Don't force or manipulate them to answer a question," she says. "Respect their boundaries."
If something *is* brought up during the game that needs attention or causes a heated interaction, move on or pause. Then, pick a later time to chat when you're both calm and go into the convo with an open mind.Related Story25 Qs to Ask Your Partner Before Having Kids
Outside the Box/Fun Questions:
After some heavier questions, a round of light-hearted ones is just what Dr. Overstreet orders. "Remember, [these] games are to be fun and enjoyed," she says. And even though these Qs seem kinda silly, they still offer plenty of good insight like how your partner seeks validation and what they value in a home and in themselves.
Questions about Sex and Intimacy:
It wouldn't be a couple's quiz without some steamy Qs, but these expert-suggested questions go beyond pillow talk. "A healthy and connected relationship is one where sex and intimacy are discussed," says Dr. Overstreet. "As we change, grow, and evolve, the role of sex can also change."
Talking about your view on sex—as well as your current wants, needs, and desires—is an important way to "ensure that you both are evolving your emotional and physical intimacy within the relationship," Dr. Overstreet explains. Plus as an extra bonus, it makes for some v hot foreplay.Related StorySuper-Sexy Qs to Ask Your PersonRachel VarinaRachel is a full-time freelance writer covering everything from the best vibrators to the best TV shows to watch with your family. This content is created and maintained by a third party, and imported onto this page to help users provide their email addresses. You may be able to find more information about this and similar content at piano.io